Good morning? I know it's only 12:40 AM here where I am, at this minute, but I can't sleep and I can't tell if I'm going into labor or not. I told my hubby how I was feeling, but he has work in the morning and needed to get some sleep just in case I'm not in labor. So I told him to go to sleep, and we'll see how I feel in the morning.
Problem is, that was just an hour ago. I can't sleep. Ever since about 8:00 PM this evening, I have been having contractions. (Having one now: 12:42 AM.) At first I wasn't sure that they even WERE contractions; they felt a lot as if the baby was simply stretching out. But I began to notice them coming more frequently--between 4 to 15 minutes apart. I still can't really tell if they are all contractions. What if a lot of it IS the baby stretching out, and my contractions are actually much farther apart? What makes this so hard on me is that with my first son, it was easy to tell. How is it that my SECOND time around, after already having experience with this, it's so much harder and more confusing than the first time? With my first son, I had some spotting in the morning, and by that evening I was having contractions that were intensifying and becoming excruciatingly painful as they grew more frequent. (Having another contraction: 12:46 AM.) These contractions feel more like an uncomfortable tightening of my stomach, usually the top and middle of my stomach but I don't feel it as much in the lower section. Sometimes it also feels like cramps, sometimes they are painful, but usually just very uncomfortable (the tightening can be pretty painful in itself, though).
I spent an hour this evening looking online at mommy-to-be forums, seeing how other pregnant women felt and how it was for other people when they went into labor with their children, and what symptoms they had, and how they knew to go into the hospital, etc. (Having another contraction: 12:50 AM. This one is painful...) Unfortunately, every pregnancy is so different that even though I found a plethora of women with my exact symptoms, some of them went to the hospital only to discover that they were barely dilated more than a fingernail, while others discovered that they were dilated 7 cm already, and had the baby within hours! I even searched the differences between true labor and false labor, and what the differences are in contractions between real ones and the practice "Braxton Hicks" ones. Also disappointed to find that, once again, pregnancies are so different that the differences in the contractions are only guidelines, and it's very possible that even without being completely painful, it IS possible that I could be in labor. (Another contraction: 12:56 AM. Also painful, not quite as much as the last.) It's all very inconclusive, and thus very confusing.
I just checked the frequency of the contractions I've had since starting this post, and noticed that they are between 4-6 minutes apart. However, the majority of them aren't really painful. I am so confused and worried that I'm not going to realize I'm in labor before it's too late. Part of me wants to just take a drive to the hospital right now and get checked out, just to see my progress. Even if I'm not dilated any more than I was at my last appointment, I would at least KNOW. But at the same time, I don't want to drag my hubby and my 2 year old out of bed at 1:00 AM (Contraction: 1:01 AM) and make a 30 minute drive all the way to town just to find out that I'm not really in labor. Having my mind at ease and being considerate of the family at the same time is not an easy combination. :( And I'm not sure that at this point in a pregnancy, having everyone else happy is really a top priority, since they aren't the ones about to push out a baby. (Contraction: 1:05 AM.)
Well, thanks for listening to me and hearing out my worries and concerns. I'll keep you posted (haha, little blog joke) as to my progress, and I'll let you know tomorrow if it was true or false labor. I think what I've decided to do is go back to bed for now and at least attempt to get some sleep. If during the night the contractions stay constant, get any more frequent or any more painful, or I just can't take it any more, I'll wake my family up anyways. But I'm going to try to sleep, and when my husband gets up for work at 6:00 AM (if I still feel this way) I will ask him to call his boss and let him know that he will be taking me to the hospital. At that point, I will call the on-call nurse and let them know how I've been feeling and that I will be coming in, and I will get my progress checked to see if I'm in labor or not. Worst case scenario: I'm not having the baby yet, and I have to drive my hubby to work (since we'd already be in town) and drive back to pick him up that afternoon. Best case scenario: I'm actually in labor and the nurse tells me I got there with plenty of time to spare, and I get a comfy bed and an epidural. (Contraction: 1:10 AM.) Either way, my next doctor's appointment isn't scheduled until Tuesday afternoon, and the way I feel right now... I doubt I could wait until then to get checked. I just want to know what's going on in my body, ya know?
Looking forward to the morning, and finding out for sure. Thanks again for listening, everyone. It means a lot to have someone I can talk to (especially in the middle of the night).
Good night :)
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